Topical anesthetic creams are pretty amazing stuff. I’m not sure how long it’s been around but I can tell you that as a teenager I really could have used a tube of this. Essentially it is used to numb the surface of a selected body part.
It has many names and is probably best known as Lidocaine or by my pet nickname of ‘the dull stuff.’ Read on past the table to learn more as we review each anesthetic cream featured.
Top 4 Numbing Creams
Ellie’s Little Topical Anesthetic Cream Practical Joke….:)
Topical anesthetic creams come in many forms including creams, ointments, aerosol sprays, lotions and jellies. I must admit I was not being very professional in one job I had years ago when I rubbed a little outside the rim of the coffee cup of a co-worker who was a real jerk. I know, I should have gone to management to complain but he was my manager.
Would I recommend using a topical anesthetic for that purpose? Probably never again, but it sure felt pretty good at the time. What I have discovered the best use of topical anesthetic cream in my current life is to assist me with hair removal. Let me explain how that works.
Suppose you aren’t as brave as me when it comes to shooting atom-smashing pulses of light at your crotch because it stings a bit. Okay, I’ll give you that. The first time I did it I thought I may have surgically removed something by accident.
The Benefits of Anesthetic Creams are Many
Trust me, the laser will work and if you applied the topical anesthetic cream in the right place you won’t feel a thing. Even if you accidentally set your crotch on fire, the cream will numb you to the point you will only be clued in if you actually replaced the batteries to your smoke alarm. Believe me, you don’t want firemen rushing to your aid when you have no feeling between your legs. It was not how I pictured myself when it happened to me.
If you are a bit squeamish about hair removal, even under your arms, the use of topical anesthetic creams will most certainly take away you inhibitions on that matter. You may even find yourself looking forward to a laser treatment or a bit of full contact epilation now that the pain factor is removed.
The other side of the coin is that if the numbness is most distressing to you and the whole idea just makes you uncomfortable, you can just do what I do and that is use topical anesthetic creams every so often.
1). UberNumb (4 oz) 5% Lidocaine , Pain Relief Cream, Lidocaine Ointment, Numbing CreamA girlfriend of mine does not have the same pain threshold that I do, and she’s been divorced twice. So, I know, I sort of consider her a glutton for punishment but when it comes to laser hair removal she is not into that kind of pain. Or, at least according to her, it’s the worst kind of pain she has ever endured – childbirth included.
She threw her purse at me. Then she followed it with a number of choice words I am only sure I’ve heard one or two truckers use and promptly limped away from me in a huff. I was certain our friendship of a few years was over. I sensed she didn’t like that I can give myself a laser treatment and barely flinch but I didn’t really tell her my secret. When the opportunity presented itself I confessed that I had used a topical lidocaine product. The one I was using at the time was known as UberNumband came in a small 4-ounce tube.
Well, she borrowed mine. Okay, she stole it from me in a feeble attempt to get even for my taunts and the next time I saw her she was completely tanned from a wild and crazy tropical getaway. She thanked me for the topical tip and we are once again the best of friends!
2). Curacaine Rapid Acting Topical Analgesic Anesthetic CreamsI will stress that when I first saw that this product was promoted as rapid acting it sort of scared me. I thought that if I accidentally sat on a tube I would be in some serious trouble. While I have no real problem with parts of my body being numb when I’m administering some kind of traumatic therapy to them (laser hair removal for example) I just didn’t like the idea of going numb in an instant.
I pictured a sleepover with some of the girls and some of the pranks that would be played with this magic tube of goo. I know, even I couldn’t resist the temptation of putting a small amount on the toilet seat just for kicks. But somehow I did resist.
Here’s my proof about the versatility of Curacaine: One of my girlfriends has been using this anesthetic cream product for everything from treating insect bites, where it numbs the skin around the bite and prevents itching, to prepping her armpits and inner thighs for a laser hair removal session.
She actually keeps a tube in her first aid kit at home and I’ve considered getting one to do the same. If I had any criticism about this cream I would say I would like to see it available in a larger size otherwise it’s perfect in every other way.
3). LMX 4 Topical Anesthetic Cream : Topical Anesthetic Creams With 4% LidocaineLMX 4 Topical Anesthetic Cream is a pretty amazing product for a lot of reasons. It acts in about 10-minutes by numbing wherever you rubbed the gel.
This is the product I should have used as part of my toilet seat prank, but I wouldn’t recommend it. Partly due to the fact that if you prank the wrong person, they could do something absolutely horrible with numbing cream in order to get even. I’d hate to even cross that line. Secondly, the LMX 4 tube contains either 15 or 30 grams of the topical numbing gel. In real world measurements that is barely enough to numb more than half of one bum in the toilet seat prank.
Enough about the pranking! Let’s look at what this product can do in the purpose it was created. The gel is rated highly by users simply because of the fact that it absorbs quickly.
Where this product loses a lot of marks is for the same reason I listed – the minimal amount for what it costs. I’m not expecting this stuff to be sold in a tub, but at least in a larger tube would be nice. I’m thinking enough to numb half dozen bums would be enough to last a while when being used as part of a laser hair removal treatment.
4). Numb Master 5% Lidocaine Topical Anesthetic CreamThere are a lot of ways to use topical anesthetic creams. If you were ever one of my roommates after college, and there were quite a few, you will know I found some creative ways to use this product that did not appear on the label.
But let’s stick to the label on this one. I will tell you that the Numb Master Anesthetic Cream is off the chart simply because it contains the highest concentration of lidocaine allowed without a prescription.
What does that mean? Well, it simply means this is a tub jam packed with the most ultimate numbing cream known to mankind and allowed by law this side of the pharmacist’s notepad.
With this in mind, I would say it would be as effective when used as part of a hair removal treatment but strongly suggest reading and following the instructions. Remember, this is a highly concentrated product so expect some heavily concentrated results.
Topical Anesthetic Creams Do Work: Girls, There Is NO Need To Suffer Pain!
Really, why suffer Pain?? You don’t need to with so many different types of topical anesthesia and I strongly suggest going and grabbing yourself one of these over the counter tubes of topical anesthetic creams for pain free delight. Really, truly, trust me, I am a wimp when it comes to pain in case you haven’t gathered and I like Life to be a pleasant experience , whatever it may be….
Yours Truly In Pain Freeness,